>>19774like, sincerely, just think about the life you could have. You could have a partner, you could have your own house or apartment, you could move to whatever city you want wherever you want, you can go to school if you want to again, you can play video games even more if you want to, you can *make* video games, you can make children, you can get better jobs, you can be completely independent and free (within the guidelines of the State of course). You just need to realize that, and use all of your remaining energy to seize it.
It will take time, it will take effort, it will be laborious and tumultuous at times, you will still end up feeling pain in the process of getting out, but ideally after the process is done you can move on. You can finally grieve over the life you left behind and the trauma that's been weighing you down for your entire life up till this point.
I really don't know who you are or if this is even a real story due to >imageboard culture but if this is at all real I just wish I could give you a hug and tell you in person that you deserve better.