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/hell/ - internet death cult

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Remember to keep it cozy!

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 No.3277[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

When was the last time you was in love?
I mean butterflies in your stomach and all that weird stuff.
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I think 2018? Damn that was a long time ago


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never ago


4-5 years ago, never again :weedsoldier:


I had like a gf that I kissed and held hands with like 14 years ago but that was it. I never really felt romantic love for anyone besides maybe extremely mild infatuation



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How do we stack up gang?
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Would never stick my dick in anyone from a bar or a club.


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I'm almost 30 wow this is pretty bad. Idk if I should be proud of myself or rope.


I am none of those sushis but this post still made me smile


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Another useless thread, sorry.


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no, that's a good question


Is anyone stopping you besides yourself?

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so basically the idea is to have someone there who will listen to you complain about your dumb problems and comfort you and watch 90's anime with you on discord, but you'll never get to meet irl or know each other in dept.
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Sushi, that's just your average Discord friend.


I have always thought that's what the Sushigirl chat was and is to this day for. Let's not call sushifriends fake, that is mean AND fake!


TvTropes has a good article on the False Friends trope.


something tells me you're a cis man.

youre showing extremely strong signs of being raised under toxic masculinity. Sharing your emotions or problems is not exclusive to lovers, and helping our friends with their emotional trouble is a normal and healthy thing.

Assuming only a lover is able to do that shows that you may have been raised to believe men shouldnt show their true emotions, which is toxic because it teaches you to hide away your emotions which causes them to amplify and grow, rather than express and work through them


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I have few.

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 No.4152[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

I thought of making this thread here so that I don't derail the place with things most people wouldn't like to indulge.
Sadness is something that can be a bit of a vicious cycle, indulge too much in it and you'll see it as your only refuge.
But, we do need to let it out sometimes. Come let out whatever is doing you wrong sushi
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I am re-watching Watamote and it is hard to watch, I am only now realizing I was just like Tomoko during college and I have only been getting more socially-inept since then. It's one thing when you're an awkward loner as a teenager, but at my age… I should really have grown past it by now.
I thought I would be ok alone, but I've been having recurring painful dreams where I recognize an old friend. We talk and I tell them to call me when we wake up, but obviously they never do. I'm a coward. Anxiety controls me. It's been years, can we even go back?


I hate myself and my malfunctioning brain
I'm just a freak


I have to give in all the time and I guess it's okay I shouldn't complain but sometimes it's tiring and I have nobody to talk to. Even if I did, though, it would be no use, I probably wouldn't want to say it out loud anyway because it's all dumb shit and I just need to suck it up.
I wish I was normal.


I don't really like venting because it tends to become a habit in me but right now I kind of have to because I can't take this off my head.
In the mornings all I want is to drink tea and READ and STUDY but now I can't and it's fucking eating me. Worst part is, I have the tea, I have the morning, but I can't fucking do what I would really like to do, I have nothing to do! I guess I should go and do something else, do some gardening, that should be good. But honestly the ONE thing that I really like has been taken away from me and I don't know how I'll be able to endure this.
I need to find something, idk, a job? fuck this shit.
Worst part is I don't want to end up blaming the people I love or becoming an angry, bitter person because of this. I have no idea what to do! I guess I'm just going through a bit of an abstinence phase, we are creatures of habit and the force of habit is gnawing at me, I need some time to forget about this. I keep remembering the books that I was reading just a few days ago and I feel bothered that I couldn't get to continue with that. But it is futile, and it was futile even then, as I could hardly get a moment to read lol.
I am also aware that given how obsessive I am it was causing me to not pay attention because that is all that I wanted to do all the time. I guess as the day goes by I will have other stuff to do and then I'll be able to forget this but the mornings are the worst moment for me right now.
I was considering trying to find a quiet moment when I can do this without any distractions but the morning has always been my favorite time to do this. On the other hand if I were to, say, devote the nightly hours to reading, well, I wouldn't get enough sleep for one thing, and I would again be distracted all day thinking about the time for reading, which would probably keep me from paying attention the way it always does.
I need to change my image of myself and who I am, what I need is a complete overturn of myself.


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My grandma died in December, she had breast cancer. Probably one of my favorite people, yet I didn't feel anything when I heard the news. I wish I had any compassion in me, but I am completely self-absorbed.

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 No.2942[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

I have major gender dysphoria and its certainly a drag on life, and I just want to rant about it, and you guys are all nice (oh yeah so fair warning this is just me going on about my problems, also this may be really long and I don't know if there's a character limit so this may be multiple parts).

I'm just never going to look or feel right, I don't think. Because I just happened to be born with this mental illness. As a kid, I always liked to imagine myself as a girl for some reason. In internet circles I'd pretend I was a girl, for no real reason other then preference. It wasn't like I was doing it for kicks, saying I was a guy after flirting with someone, i really just liked being a girl instead. I lived in a pretty liberal area, so I found out about trannies by middle school, and by age 14 i was pretty sure I was one. Unfortunately, I was a very early bloomer, and puberty hit me really hard. I was 5'10" at 14 and only kept growing, grew facial hair in middle school, broad shoulders, square jaw, everything. And I hated it as much then as I did now. I grew my hair out and to this day have real nice hair with perfect curls but that was kind of the end of things I actually liked about myself. With my frame, nobody ever really mistook me for a girl, even from behind. Guy friends I had that were super short or just feminine in general got mistaken for girls without even trying or wanting to and I felt really jealous. When I was 15 I started having friends call me "Abby" online and told them about some of this. I started getting that feeling of "being a women trapped in a man's body" people talk about as opposed to "being a man that want to be a woman," a change you don't really notice until it happens. That felt pretty nice. Every now and then, when I was home alone, I'd sneak into my sister's room and wear her clothes and look in the mirror for a while. I stopped because it felt like I was doing something perverted even though I wasn't attracted to women (more on that later), but it felt nice to take pictures of myself in dresses, even though I deleted them afterwards. but…yea. I just really hated being a man. Sometimes I would curl up and stare at all the hair on my legs and nearly have a breakdown over that.(Part 1/?)
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Coming in here to say the path is up to you and you really, honestly shouldn't listen to altchan users when it comes to medical advice. See a therapist, they'll know better than anyone.


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The entire notion of "transgender" is inherently bigoted, it's rooted in homophobia and sexism. There is no such thing as a man who expresses himself "as a woman". A man who wears makeup is expressing himself in one of the many ways that men can, and by insisting that he's a woman, or even by allowing him to insist that he's a woman, you're actively reducing the number of ways men are allowed to express themselves. You're saying "no, men aren't allowed to be beautiful or wear makeup. they have to become women if they want to do that". You're saying "no, girls aren't allowed to cut their hair short or play sports. they have to become men if they want to do that". Enforced conformity is all it is. It's no different from an oppressive traditionalist purity spiral. If you actually cared about these people you would want them to love and accept their bodies and their actual, true selves. They aren't transgender. Nobody is. There's no such thing as "transgender". They're just afraid of society bludgeoning them to force them to get back in line. So instead of changing their behavior to be more socially acceptable for men, they think they can change their bodies to be more socially acceptable for their behavior. Do you not see how that's the same problem either way? People need to stand up and say "men can wear makeup and women can have hairy legs and it's not taboo". They should never, EVER give in to the society's bigoted demands by changing their bodies to look more like the opposite sex, which never works by the way and always results in monstrosities. If you don't see why actual LGB people are against transgender ideology you're either a bad faith bigot or you have zero empathy.


tell me you've never actually interacted with trans people without telling me


While I agree with some of your points, I think you are narrowing down the motivation behind changing sex to social acceptance, which might not be the driving force behind a major part of these cases. For example in my eyes an equally important factor would be to establish a personal gender identity and live up to it. This form of identity is heavily influenced by perceived gender roles, just like ones value system will be influenced by parents, teachers, ones broader social group, nationality and then again things that separate you within these groups.

The emphasis here is on being influenced. People will go against the grain, if the values and behavioural patterns imposed on them don't feel right. This of course takes constant effort and removes a lot of support, but do you really think that changing ones sex with all the operations, medication, legal shit and social stigma is the easy way out?


>hetero-patriarchal society constructs category of "woman"
>if you challenge that category, you're homophobic and sexist.
in fact it is you my friend who are sexist. You claim that you're in favour of gender non-conformity, but you refuse to challenge the categories of sex/gender and assume that they are transcendent rather than the truth that these are socially constructed, and that they have been constructed in patriarchal societies to serve the interests of patriarchy.
>A man who wears makeup is expressing himself in one of the many ways that men can, and by insisting that he's a woman, or even by allowing him to insist that he's a woman, you're actively reducing the number of ways men are allowed to express themselves. You're saying "no, men aren't allowed to be beautiful or wear makeup. they have to become women if they want to do that".
In fact, the only person who is strictly enforcing behaviours or reducing the ways one might express oneself is you. Why are you so invested in limiting the possibility space for people, ie "yes you can wear makeup, but only as a man who wears makeup".
>you would want them to love and accept their bodies and their actual, true selves.
I would like you to explain what an "actual true self" is, and why it is necesarily static and fixed. Your approach is missguided individualism, you are convinced that each person is an island seperate from social forces, and in doing so you have missidentified those social forces as unchanging essential facts of nature. To put it simply, if a "true self" is anything it is ever changing and flowing.
> They should never, EVER give in to the society's bigoted demands by changing their bodies to look more like the opposite sex
You have made a few errors here. First of all, you fail to understand that in this case, you are the person who is strictly enforcing gender categories. You talked about some basic gendered behaviours such as playing sports or wearing makeup, but have failed to explain why your logic of free desire and behaviour with regard to gender expression shouldn't extend to taking hormones, changing your name, or asking people to reffer to you be certain pronouns. Secondly, you have assumed that sex Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

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See you tommorow! Or in 4 years heh
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Any preference on who?


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someone like her…


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Say Sei


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/sushi/ meetup

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I heard this board is very comfypilled.

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 No.1944[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

Group screaming thread

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