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Captchas didn't work. Sticking to janitors while we try to think of something else.

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 No.8552[Last 50 Posts]

Let's have a thread for friendly ladying about life's little pains.
After 10 or so years of my right jaw clicking when opening and closing, I got a sudden pain and now my jaw doesn't click anymore. Thing is, I can only open my mouth about half of what I used to be able to. Seeing the dentist on Thursday but feeling some despair. Not in terrible pain though, just some soreness.

What's bothering you?


Great thread idea!
I have an open bite, which means that my front teeth don't touch together and I can't bite things properly. Noodles are particularly annoying.


that sucks
did you ever have braces as a kid?


I get a pain in my hip joint after walking for a long time. Once it starts it only gets worse and I have to stop. It used to take 20+ miles to get there, but lately it starts around mile 3. Kind of sucks knowing there are people in their 70s who regularly walk more than I can manage.


my ears have always been especially sensitive to popping. especially during the in between seasons when the air pressure changes. it's quite burdensome


I have a professor who's into mind games it's nothing crazy, but it's a "you have to read and watch everything I upload to the minute detail" to pass. He's had a quiz were you were only supposed to answer 2 questions, it was in the test description box most skip, and you'll only known the answers if you watch his videos short videos. Again nothing crazy, in fact it's the bare minimum you could do, but a change of pace.


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Oh dude I had the same exact thing. Went to the dentist and he said that it might be caused by my braces when I still had them. It's basically a misalignment of your jaw joints. To fix that you'll have to get a special plastic thingy shaped like your teeth to wear over night. Don't ignore that problem, sushi! Leaving this untreated can result in chronic headaches because it causes pressure on your temples.


My right foot's arch randomly pangs when I go walking. No warning at all just one sharp pang that appears as fast as it disappears. It kind of worries me because the pangs aren't after some crazy marathon. They're from walking around the neighborhood.

Another problem is I might be developing eczema on my face. A might because I develop small patches of eczema all the time. They either go away of grow into full blown visible eczema. Really hoping it goes away. Another problem is the only steroid creme I can use on my face has a slightly tingling/burning side effect.


you are right
I saw a specialist a week ago and he put in temporary caps that moved my bite forward. After a week my joint relocated and I can open and close without popping for the first time in a decade…I'll probably shell out the big $$$ to make the caps permanent.


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Never thought I'd be like this, but I truly don't know what I want to with my life. I have no passion and nothing pains me to the point I don't want to do it. I just have a neutral attitude to most things

My main problem is I don't know if I want to leave academia and start working once I graduate or pursue higher education. I want to be a Mech. eng. and I think I could use that degree to get a better paying Patent layer position or get a concentration in Biomedical and become a doctor. I should probably ghost people at their jobs before doing anything drastic.


> I truly don't know what I want to with my life. I have no passion and nothing pains me to the point I don't want to do it. I just have a neutral attitude to most things
I felt the same way as you, and largely still do, but I never made a decision and now I'm nearing 30 and still hopping from crummy job to crummy job. Of course I've had other issues as well, but my point is I think it's important to make a choice and stick to it, whether it's going for a degree or picking a job that you can actually advance in.


I'm in a similar position. I just finished a comp sci degree, now idk where to go.
The problem for me is that my depression is pretty bad rn, so I find myself taking the path of least resistance/work.


Nice! I'm glad that they found a solution for you!


You have no idea of the dread I got reading this, I'm sure I have the exact same click in my jaw when I open and close it. So, this is my fate?


I may have overstepped my bounds taking this course. It's already payed for and everything and its too late to drop out now


my back hurts but there's nothing I can do about it


I have arrythmia and I dunno if I can smoke cigarettes that often. I also have a chronic pressure in my head that sucks a lot.


low back pain? it's the worst


Same boat, might be depressed myself but I'm not sure. I wouldn't say that I have a neutral attitude, actually I think I care too much and that it hurts to care.


upper and neck mostly
from many years of bad posture


Any other tinnitus sushi rolls here? I've had it since I was in middle school without pause. Been noticing it more these days.


I have it too.
One day when i went to sleep this ring started ringing and never stopped, it's not that loud and i mostly don't hear it anymmore but after leaving loud places it gets higher for some time.


Me too, had some nights where the ringing was too loud to even sleep.
I've stopped using headphones recently too since that made it worse.


If your ears are ringing, you should answer them.


I just get a dialtone when I answer.


i have a low grade high whine in both ears and then kind of an extra frequency on top of that in the right ear. It seems to get louder when the ear is irritated (like after swimming).


I had this terrible pain in my knees and feet for the longest time. It was painful just to get up and walk any distance. I saw a doctor about this and it turns out I had very little calcium in my diet which was causing problems with my nerves. I've been on supplements for a few months and the pain has almost completely gone away, thankfully.


This is the sushi post of the year.


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I keep getting heartburn in the mornings lately. Maybe I eat too much before I go to bed, or I don't eat at sufficiently regular times. Or maybe it's because of my messed up sleep cycle in general. I can get antacids to address the symptoms, but I'd rather treat the cause.


I was leaving my neighborhood and some dude got out his car, shot a round of bullets at everyone, and drove off. Not how I wanted to end my Friday

No one was hurt and I think all the bullets missed. I have no idea why they started shooting, but some people think it was some road rage shit.

The event is to fresh for any new stations or cops, saw them driving my way though, so I have no clue if any one was actually hurt or if the dudes still out there. Jesus Christ my neighborhood is considered pretty safe too. Kind of paranoid to drive back now


Holy crap, scary. Stay safe sushi.


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Will do.


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I have to program a Tic-Tac-Toe in python, but I can't grasp the ideas and ended up searching in google how to do it.
I'm a lie to myself


literally everyone does this, don't be too hard on your self


I waited a very long time to reunite with someone but they don't want anything to do with me anymore. Feels bad. I fell for the love thing. I want to die.


I developped Osgood-Schlatter disease in my youth from too much working out and since that I've stopped going out as much and am now a weaker shell of the person I used to be. I think what I really regret is that I let it dictate my life, because now it's incredibly hard to go back to my old habits.


But then don't just write the code and be done with it.
Instead consider what is the essence of the solution (say, a 3x3 array of 3-valued cells: {empty|X|O}) and then think of what you were missing in your initial attempt to solve it. So that next time you have an idea of what you could try to do.
If you want a couple tips that usually apply to programming: data structures at the foundation of your program. And take a hint from /sci/ memes: everything is an array of numbers.


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I installed a site blocker to concentrate more on work and it irritates me it works so good. I wanna slack off, but everything's blocked and I have no way of subverting the block.

The block has at least help me. I do my school work at at least something productive. I still run into the problem of avoiding some work because I have anxiety around task, but now my slacking off is just rewriting my notes and not watching youtube


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Nevermind sushis, I actually got to do it and I didn't end up just copypasting what I was doing only because the guy narrating was a massive california roll
I'm currently reviewing other's code, and it's enraging the audacity of some to just copypaste the same stuff from another site without even taking into account the task asks for a representation of the board in a different manner.
Also their code is filthy, a bunch of lines that repeat themselves and could've been coded dynamically. Will they do the same when they have a job?


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I can feel my legs and feet getting weaker. Walking around wears them out and they just feel flimsy and sore all the time. I need to dig up the rowing machine and start eating more.


good for you sushi roll
somehow i got through school and got a job yet i still get distracted every 5 minutes by another website


I had this for the longest time because I had a calcium deficiency. Especially the bottoms of my feet. I'd look into that, could at the very least be a contributing factor.


God that picture is sexy, but empathizing with the girl is so tiresome. I can feel her pain.


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I just want my dad to know the reason I'm behind in some of my classes and staying up late isn't because I'm mismanaging my time, but because I took on a a stupidly large work load. I know I slacked off a bit, but can't he understand me having trouble balancing 6 classes isn't a problem of laziness? I feel like I have to work 24/7 to prove I'm not some lazy bum and I feel like a failure taking a break off around him.

I was up until 7:30 to 11:00 PM working and him just walking in and saying "You need to manage your self better next time and not waste it on entertainment" just put me in a bad mood the rest of the day. That bad mood caused me to randomly snap and cry over something stupid in front of him.


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Worried that my online friend is actually a pedo… We met through similar obscure music tastes on youtube before it went to shit. I think they have BPD or something, they seem obsessed with creating different internet personas with different names.

They're all pretty similar-looking anime pfps. I guess it's a bit creepy of me, but after doing some digging through these different profiles, I found some disturbing stuff.

At first it was just looking though playlists they had compiled on youtube. Some of these contained videos of little girls. Usually they're tiny channels, with <100 views, usually just silly/cute childish nonsense, so I can't really fathom why they'd be interested.

Later, I found more suspect shit on twitter. I'm not sure if it's the same person or not, but there were a lot of suspect accounts on twitter that openly like and retweet explicit loli shit. Even this wasn't particularly worrying to me, even if I found it distasteful.

But at one point in one of these twitter circles there was a big controversy after one anime pfp account (acc name Lucas, with a girls und panzer pfp), which a decent amount of followers for posting weird /trad/ or esoteric life advice. At one point, the owner of that account got outed for grooming kids on discord and it all got deleted.

I can't say for certain, but don't think it was the same person as my friend. But since they did seem to have a weird online association with my friend (same followers, etc). It's the combination of these factors that have made me more and more worried that my friend might have an interest that goes beyond 2d girls…


That's a tough situation for sure.
Have you talked to this person at all about it? If it's distressing to you and you value your friendship I would say it's worth it to bring up. As uncomfortable as the topic might be, there is a line to be drawn between having esoteric tastes and actually acting on them in unacceptable ways, and if you're worried your friend is engaged in the latter it's worth bringing up.


No I haven't, partly because I'm not sure if it's even them or not. And so I'm not sure if their interest is just a sort of platonic affection for cute things, some kind of weird self-insertion fetish or something, or something worse.

And I'm not sure how I would even bring it up tbh. The conversations are usually very ironic, so it's hard to tell what's really sincere. What if I'm wrong and I lose some of the only people I can discuss my niche hobbies with?


Man, I struggled to maintain my grades with just 4 or 5 classes. 6 is like 18-24 credit hours. Depending on the subjects that can be workload akin to two full-time jobs.
Did he go to college? If he did I'm sure he understands that. Does he usually struggle to empathize with you?


Well, I hate to say it, but I think it's best to either accept/forget about it if you aren't willing to confront them, or just cut off contact if the potential of it all upsets you enough to not want to be their friend. You might find it gross but plenty of people are a fan of "explicit loli shit" while being otherwise entirely fine human beings. As for everything else, if you aren't sure it's even them and aren't willing to actually bring it up with this person, you have to ask yourself why you dug for this info anyways.

Maybe you will call me out for being too sympathetic, but after a long time of interacting with strangers online it's best to remember that everyone has unsavory and potentially complicated aspects of themselves that they'd perhaps rather not share with others. Of course there should be a line drawn at illegal or unethical behavior, but it's up to you to find if that line is being crossed, and indeed where the line even is in the case of the latter.


I feel that, my mom tends to be the same way, doing things like screaming at me for long periods of time about how much of a terrible person I am for not having finished some essay since the last time she'd checked in on me five minutes before. I ended up taking 7 years to get my bachelor's because there were some semesters where I just gave up entirely. I even ended up in the psych ward once. I graduated eventually though, and even got a job recently, so hopefully I'll be able to move out soon. She keeps talking as if it's a given that I'll continue to live at home, but I'm gonna do everything in my power to make sure that's not the case.


I was in a similar situation, sushi. My mom was the same way, especially after I graduated and couldn't find a job right away. I eventually did, moved out and things have been going well for me. The best of luck to you.


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I'm craving some physical intimacy real bad lately, not even sex that much just cuddling and being close to someone in general, but I also don't have any motivation or desire to get to know someone new or to talk that much. When I was in school and stuff I ended up with long term partners several times somehow because I have a comfy presence or something, but it's not something you can use to get dates online, don't have enough flirt game text wise to actually get to meet.
At this point I feel like I'll be alone for the rest of things, such is life as a mostly non verbal ghoul person. I just want a real hug.


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I think things will change for the better when you move. Most friction comes from living together but when that's out of the way relationships tend to mellow. Also parents always feel proud of their children are independent. Good luck.


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I despise both US election candidates but I decided to wager some money on a handful of state races. Unfortunately it looks like I will lose money. I hate that I did this because instead of blissfully ignoring the news I am obsessively checking the results and suffering severe anxiety over the money I'll be out. Not a lifechanging amount, but enough to sting a little.

The love of money is the root of all evil, I guess.


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i'm experiencing the polar opposite issue of not craving human contact at all. given a couple of traumatizing events occurred this year that made me grow to be even more distrustful of others. but its been almost 10+ months since i've had an urge to hug someone or be intimate. it has completely degraded since then. i'm pretty worried about myself, no sex drive or desire to form connections. on the bright side it's one of a less distraction from self improvement, trying to become happy without validation or dependence. what's wrong with me though. end of rambling i guess.


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I'm coming to terms I might not have the full college experience next year. I'll start college next year and it looks like covid wont let up by then. My school has also been dealing with the crisis horribly, frats have caused breakouts and classes still cost the same online. Dunno man I felt like it would be over by now


Do you live down below or something? If there's still a year left until next academic year it's hard to say when it'll be over.


Oh hey, I know that intersection. I love how people just don't give a fuck in this city. I'm just back from Libertador Av. and a couple of kids had sofas and a small CRT right in the middle of the sidewalk. They were playing some Playstation 2 not two blocks away from the Japanese Garden. I should've taken a picture, but I'm far too autistic.


>what ails you
I want a holiday where I get pampered but I'm stuck. *sigh*


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My schools spellcheck software. I don't know how something so bad can exist in this current age


Your school has its own spellcheck? Is it some kind of add on in word or whatever?


last week I had a small pimple in my armpit.
two days ago the pimple had grown into a ping-pong ball sized enflamed boil that felt like a hot knife
today I saw the doctor who cut it open immediately (damn, the lidocaine injection hurt like a friendly lady)
as of now it's still sore and leaking pus, but it doesn't hurt near as much as yesterday.
by next week I'll probably have forgotten about it.
Amazing how fast your bodily condition can change.


"midsized" should be hyphenated.


I thought I had an infection or eustachian tube malfunction or something but then I sneezed and a couple pencil erasers' worth of earwax fell out. It's been so long since that happened I'd forgotten how it felt. The soreness and crunchy feeling and sound is pretty scary.


get that shit washed out
this morning I woke up with pressure in the ear and every sound echoing with a ring
I think it might be allergies, hopefully it goes away


Don't worry, I cleaned it out with a toothpick and washed it in the shower.


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Less than 11 days left in class and our teacher still hasn't graded our final exam. He has plenty of time, but I'm paranoid he's gonna put off grading until 2-3 days before closing period. He also has to grade our final project too which will take him more time. It takes him 1-2 weeks on average to put assignments in the gradebook.


He's probably procrastinating and could post in this thread about all the projects and exams he still needs to grade!


probably playing ps5


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My ability to pass depends fully on if I pass the final or not. It's truly up in the air if I pass or not.

I have that goddamn Linkin park stuck in my head because of this

On the upside it's a CC transfer course and my state works under "CC credits transfer, but don't affect your gpa". I just need a C to get the credit


It doesn't matter if you pass or not, you're valid and all your frens love you!!


Have you tried gcc?


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Online school, coupled with the pandemic, is the most difficult thing I feel I've ever done, and I've had to overcome a lot.

It's less of a "wow everything sucks and I want to cry" pain and more of a slow burn every day that compounds. My schedule hasn't gotten any less busy staying inside – I'm on the computer around 12 hours every day in a structured sense doing homework, school, and extracurricular activities. My hobbies are almost all technology-oriented as well. It feels as if schools have scrambled so hard to try to implement "normal" curriculums that the wellbeing of students has been left entirely alone.

I feel so lucky that I haven't had to worry much about my family's finances, because I don't know where I'd be now if that was the case.

Keep pushing through, everyone. we'll overcome this.


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I only vaguely remember it but apparently I stepped on a toothpaste tube last night and just went to bed mostly ignoring the pain but it made this huge shallow cut and now my feet look like I've been walking through a slaughterhouse barefooted and my bed looks like I lost my maidenhood. I hope I can get the stains out…


My schools winter break starts December 23th. jesus christ is that late


I’m so fucking fat. Why was doing anorexia so much easier when you were 14….


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Hey sushis. I just (kinda) cheated on my gf. I didn't meet anyone. I didn't touch anyone. I didn't send any pictures. I just sexted.
This sounds weird and juvenile I know.
I feel like shit now. Well, basically I know that this won't change anything about us. This whole thing was just like masturbating to porn for me. Totally removed from any personal feeling. But still… I've been kinda struggling with my weird, sexual feelings for a while now and it has reached it's peak in this. I need some deep breathers and… I'll have to reorganize my emotions… I'm a terrible human being, sushi. And all I can do is dabble in self-pity.


If your gf isn't satisfying you, there's something off. You should have a conversation with her.
She'll probably be mad if you tell her you don't find her hot, or that you need more sex, but then again if you don't say anything it'll become a communication issue. Unfortunately, relationships can't be good without proper communication.


It's not like she can't satisfy me. She does. But… I don't know… I'm at a weird point sexually. It's like I want to witness other peoples most intimate feelings. Not sure if there's a sense of voyeurim involved… Maybe I'm using it to escape something. Confrontation with myself.


I know you won’t but just break up. You are a terrible person not for the fact that you’re a coomer but for willingly continueing to violate the relationship contract. Cheaters are the true degenerates of civilization, more than whatever cuckoldery shit you’re into.


how helpful

(I'm not >>9869)
Not to endorse it or doing it again, definitely don't, but it's good that you're thinking about that kind of thing. Not enough or not the right intimacy is also a need that isn't being met in the relationship system you have. I'm not really comfortable with the way it's been phrased, since I don't want to make it sound like it's your gf's responsibility to set things up right, but while it's bad, it's almost certainly not a simple issue of you being terrible -> cheating (in fact guilt often is a big factor in cheating, so be careful there).


>>9874 was basically just saying saying what I was thinking…
I think I'll have to think about what it is that I'm missing. Maybe it's just my emotional immaturity or maybe there acrually is something missing in my life and this had to happen for me to figure out what it is. For now I'm just disappointed of myself. I love my gf. I'll be better.


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I put a new lightbulb in my bedside lamp and it's WAAAY brighter and now I can't sleep because it feels like it's already morning.

This is awful and I don't know what I should doushio.


sleep in the dark?


Buy one of those nifty led lightbulbs that can change colour. They come with a little shitty remote. Buying one of these changes my life and my overall comfyness level.


Brings back memory when my dad didn't tell anyone he replaced the 1 cruddy light bulb in our bathroom with 4 LED ones. That was an unforgettable midnight piss


I do sleep in the dark!
I like having a very dim light to help me relax and prepare me for sleep; helps the circadian rhythm. This one is just too bright for it though. I might wrap it in something to muffle the light.

I like the idea of an adjustable RGB light, but it seems like it's more hassle and probably wouldn't last as long and it's just more things to break. Maybe when I move somewhere nice and I can have my comfyroom all tricked out with many of them. Would be very relaxing and ii ne then.


Akari, how about candles?

t. Alicia


Can't wait to hear about a burnt down house in the news.


Put them in a lantern or something like that. My mother does that every evening and then falls asleep while reading or watching tv.


god why do I just leave things on the ground after using them
this is the fourth time I've stubbed my left toe today


Next time you use something, be sure to place it somewhere where you'll stub your right toe instead. Then your pain will at least be symmetrical.


sleep mask
you won't regret it


The one time I tried a sleep mask I woke up confused and panicked that I couldn't see before becoming cognizant enough to remember why


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For some reason the stores in my area have really big clothes. Adult extra small is to big for me and I often have to go to child large.

I'm not even a dude. I'm a 5'2 woman which isn't even that rare when it comes to fashion. Do I live near giants or something?


Kids tend to get cuter styles anyway~!


Sorry sushi but this sounds very cute to me. It immediately gave me the urge to hug you. Just the thought of it made me somehow smile.


Im a 5'6 dude and I'm dangerously close to shopping in the H&M teens section. All pants for adult guys are way to long and look shitty on me. It hurts man. I feel you - not being able to find fitting clothing in regular stores sucks…


That seems to be a pretty common experience for short people. It can't be helped with mass-produced clothes. I can only comfortably wear large and extra large jackets but I've never found one with sleeves that don't make me look like I've got no hands.


I have a similar problem, I'm average height for a dude but shirts (especially button downs) that are properly sized for my midriff are too tight around the shoulders and chest, and shirts that fit my shoulders are too baggy around the tummy. And on top of that my torso is longer than normal so many shirts are uncomfortably short. They really just don't mass manufacture clothes for people with unusual body shapes.


Other than the couple pairs of jeans I have that are all shredded at the bottom I've been just wearing the same half dozen tailored pants I got stitched for cheap in Asia for like 15 years. And when I walk around without shoes in pants that are too long it irritates my heels and makes them crack and eventually bleed. Pants are the worst. We should all just switch to wearing cute skirts and hosiery regardless of gender.


File: 1609054744688.png (99.37 KB, 396x353, 1600451241336.png)

a toothpaste tube cut your foot open? What kind of toothpaste tubes do you have?


woke up and my wife still isn't real
it hurts bros…


File: 1609066041126.png (3.01 KB, 500x250, Oekaki.png)

This thing at the tail can have pointy corners.


i too have cut myself on those sharp edges before


File: 1609090712222.jpg (155 KB, 728x546, too much beers.jpg)

How? I've tried 4 different tubes now and I can't get a single one to breach the skin no matter how hard I stomp. They keep folding. How was it position?


It was almost empty and all curled up and I just stumbled out of the bath so maybe the skin was extra soft or something. I don't know dude it was a freak accident.


This sushi is really preforming toothpaste science in the name of the thread, god bless.


Quality oc sushi, proud of you.


It uhh "works best" with the older-style metal tubes which still make an appearance every now and then, at least in my area. I think they're made of tin or Al. I've still cut myself on plastic ones but only if they're kinda rough with pointy edges/seams.


Nobody is asking why sushi roll leaves toothpaste tubes lying on the floor


rough up the corner a little bit then run your foot/hand across in a slicing motion
that's how i did it


Alright, this works but you need to fold it like 1000 times and each time to re-enforce the point. Even then I need to hold it together. Besides this, we're gonna have to trust >>10048 and assume there's military grade toothpaste tubes out there somewhere.


Superior Nippon toothpaste tubes folded over 1000 times!


Gonna talk to my gf about this now. I'd get through with it but I feel morally obligated to do so. I drank two beer. I feel ready. Let's go sushs.


might be too late, but you don't need to spill every secret
think about it, are you confessing your sins just to make yourself feel better? or can you forgive yourself and move past your sins on your own?


I mainly talked to her out of respect for her and based on what I would expect others to do in a similar situation. It wasn't that bad. She was mad but said that she's proud of me for taking responsibility for doing it and said she respects my honesty. Feels okay~
((I also did it because the feeling of guilt was intense and I felt that I couldn't enjoy happy moments with her until I came clean. That being said: If I had pulled through a week or so the feeling would have vanished.))


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Whether really cold this time of year, also extra precipitation. Climate Change?


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E-ink/E-readers are to expensive. Most of the files I want only come and PDF and convert shit to epub. The only e tablets good for pdfs are the supper big, the big screen imitates how the pdf would be when printed which means you don't have to zoom in super close, and ulta expensive ones. You're looking at 500 minimum if you want an optimal 10" screen. The 7" and 8" versions have 100 dollar price differences. No extra features just a hundred for an inch.

And no I can't get a big tablet.


This is the best thread I've seen in a while. You made my night, and you deserve warm cozy feelings for the forthcoming years.


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I know no one will really care, but a county music channel I like got removed from youtube, copyright strikes probably. The dude behind the channel was super dedicated to it and it showed. He had over 3,000 songs all ranging from 1900's obscure to modern day pop, these probably got the copyright strikes. I liked going through his playlists because they were so big and full of interesting music.
I'm pretty sure he died of heart attack because he stopped uploading out of the blue and some commenters mentioned an obituary in his area had his name, heart attack at age 40 (fuck that was young). I was sad, but the thought of his country channel living on made me happy. But now it's gone. 3,000 songs just gone.
I had so many songs on there I liked that are just lost, they're to niche to simply google without spending half a hour.
> What's this country boy to do?
> what's this world a comin' to?
> Oh they say that country music's gone to town


damn, that sucks, friend.
that is why if I find a song I like on youtube or streaming, I start looking for an mp3 right away. You just can't guarantee stuff will remain on the internet anymore.


Have you considered just reading them on a laptop


You should look up how e-ink works, reading from an e-ink device is very different from a regular LCD screen.
A laptop is complete overkill if all you want is to read books, and you wouldn't even get as good of a reading experience.


I dunno about the reading quality thing; if I was truly focused on reading quality I'd just get a paper book. The only thing that matters to me reading a book digitally is getting as much text on the screen as possible while the text size remains readable, so a desktop is better than a laptop is better than a tablet is better than a phone. I just binged Wheel of Time as an ebook, so it clearly doesn't matter that much whether or not I'm paying 500 bucks for an e-reader.


Not feeling well lately. Headache, stomachaches, backpains, tons of coughing and fevers night after night. Taking a break from college doesn't seem reasonable since it's online class and all I have to do is sit in front of a laptop; it's not like I have to go to classes physically.
I have a seminar to host next week and honestly I don't have the energy to even work out on my assignments. My head's too tired to think about it. No energy to even watch youtube.

Is it covid? Your answer is yes. It feels funny to take a break off college if all I need to do to go to class is open a link then sit in front of my laptop with camera on for a few hours…


File: 1610344573830.png (720.87 KB, 657x657, kobolibra.png)

I have a Kobo Libra H2O for reading. I was about 160 bucks, and I love it for reading fiction. It's a completely different experience from reading with an lcd (or similar) screen, and reasonably affordable. I have a couple hundred books on it atm.

Not so good for reading pdfs due to the slow refresh rate of eink displays, but for regular books, it's great. Definitely replaces printed fiction for me. Stock pic related.


My sleep schedule got screwed over again. It's 5:30 am and can't go to sleep.
Also I feel lonely again


File: 1610360573113.jpg (863.11 KB, 2430x1620, sata.jpg)

grrr!! ( ̄ヘ ̄メ)


Cancer and reproductive harm huh. Building computers in California sounds scary.


That's awful! Stop having covid sushi!
I hope you get over it soon, and get back to college.


I have this disease for about 10-12 years and it is the first time that I learned its name. I don't feel any pain because I don't move much in my daily life but when I start working in a gym, pain increases. is there a cure for this disease?


I've always found it funny that these warnings are only directed at Californians
Like the materials in the product just change properties when crossing the state line


OP here
six months later, my bite adjustment is still underway. now I need to get braces for 3 months.
braces hurt.


Damn, but at least it's only for a little while. Hopefully by the end your jaw will be better. Do you know if you have to get the braces realigned in a month or so because if so then get ready to feel the pain all over again.


probably. it's more the scraping on the inner lip, just waiting for the calluses to form.
funny thing is I had braces and bands for 4 years when I was a kid which my current dentist suspects eventually led to my tmj.
bonus is that my lower jaw is slightly more aesthetic now (although no one sees it thanks to mask-wearing lol).


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I said this wouldnt happen to me, but I'm legit stressed about my college application. I got it in 'late', last day of normal admission, but before rolling admission, along with the school having extra apps due to covid. Myain pro is that GPA and stats is firmly in their average and I have a few EC along with a letter.
My real fear though is geting rejected and explaning to my family Im going to a CC along with my parents disappointment. I also have to wait 2 months max to get my yes or no back.


wish i was young again…


College apps what a blast from the past
I got rejected from every uni I applied to because of bad rec letters and ended up doing brickwork and playing with stocks
Still made enough bank to actually buy a (small) house by 25 though so suck it college students I don't have 3 million in debt


unless we're talking about an ivy league school or some elite tech campus with name recognition, i wouldn't stress too much. for the majority of your lower division classes cc will offer the same quality at a lower price, and if you do well in cc transfering into a good school is pretty much a lock.
just show your parents that you are working hard wherever you end up.


I mean if you go to a CC you're paying less anyway. There's nothing wrong with transferring, I was gonna go to a uni downtown but because of covid I did CC.


Having no form of recognition starts to chip away at my mental health. Especially after hearing about a bunch of people I once new from school, that ended up as big shots. Don't get me wrong, I don't desire that, it's just a long time ago that I received pat on the shoulder or some kind words.
I start a new job soon, I hope it goes well and I can get that there. Although this job does not sound as good as my old job… Well I will know in a year or so what I like more.


well, congrats on the new job sushi roll. no idea what it is but good on you for getting it.


Thank you, sushi. I am really glad that I got that job, the entire process of getting one is incredibly taxing. Especially because Corona has hit hard where I live. I am a litte bit nervous though, quite some new stuff for me and overall the work does not sound as good as my old one.


My relationship with my dad is in shambles, my relationship with my mom has been dead since long ago. I have no true friends, I consider myself worthless.


I can't go back to sleep and sometimes I feel like the only friend I have might just abandon me.
Plus I keep thinking about traumatic shit from 5 years ago. I guess I would've been more normal if all that shit didn't happen to me.


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After months of having awful episodes with my (ex) girlfriend I decided to break up with her. At first it was hard, but when she made up her mind about it and called me, I felt, and still feel like shit. The reason why we broke up is because I've realized that her mental illness was getting to me, and that wasn't doing more harm than good to both of us. It was four years, man. It's hard. I can't help but feeling hopeless, alone, and bad for her. I'm so scared she might harm herself. Just wanted to get that off of my chest. Thanks for reading, sushi roll.


More of a mild irk, but one of my school projects requires us to make a tik-tok. I really don't want to make an account or use it, but it's a non debatable. I think I'll just play the must obnoxious song I can find in the background


The teacher that gave you that to do is an idiot. Imagine how embarrassing it would be for a kid who couldn't afford a smart phone.


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My dick is shedding and it hurts like hell. Every little movement sends jolts of pain through my entire body. There are little white dots on the foreskin and the entire penis is reddened. I have to pee but I can't get up. Maybe I can finally die.


Its ok sushi. Ive been on your shoes a few times. You need to do whats best for you, I promise. My last relationship was similar too. It never gets easier does it?


File: 1613337509222.jpg (190.12 KB, 768x768, 1532566011713.jpg)

I hate valentines day grrr


It's ok sushi, plenty of people probably hate this day too.


wtf why is your dick shedding?


Go to a hospital dude what the heck


File: 1613421535320.png (306.68 KB, 600x600, b8242b3adc3a8fa7c054f919e9….png)

I would like to know that as well. All I know is that it didn't stop.


maybe your cocoon is becoming a butterfly.


File: 1613499794458.jpg (841.18 KB, 1920x1080, 1451236322.jpg)

My dick got even redder, it now has the shade of a tomato or a paprika. The white dots from the foreskin started to spread to the glans. Pus started to appear.
I wanted to go to the hospital like >>10497 suggested, because it got worse but after getting up I was very disoriented and dizzy. This made me walk straight into a wall, which knocked me out. I woke up on the ground, blood on my forehead and the ground. Afterwards I called my brother and asked him to drive me to the hospital.
Turns out I have a fungi on my dick and a laceration on my head, which I had to sew. Now I have to put a creme on my penis for 1 week. And I should clean the blood in my apartment.


sounds like you're living the lyrics of a cannibal corpse song
hope you get better


File: 1613661813437.mkv (100.89 KB, what_the_fuck_musescore.mkv)

Trying to make a cover of a song I really like, but even though I'm somewhat musical if there's more than one-two notes at a time I can't tell things apart well enough to write down for the life of me. Recently discovered though that you can import midis into musescore. And for guitar you can set a staff to have an automatically generated tab of the notes. Amazing. Only shame is, mostly every single thing else about musescore is a clusterfuck and regardless of how simple you think something should be, it somehow has this weird ability to do something completely different than what you intended. Or just there's some weird obstacle between what you want to happen you can't even comprehend.
I don't even want to do anything complex, accidentally broke stuff inserting simultaneous notes before reaching the second bar. Also video related, what even, how even
Musescore is bothering me to bits


Forgot I didn't explain, put the mp3 of the song I want to cover through an automatic MIDI generator which got all the right notes (works cause piano + vocals only), just with lots of false positives as well because of voice wobble etc, so finding the correct notes manually and creating a clean music sheet from scratch


I like Sib 7 (p*rated) for piano stuff. Don't really use it for anything else though, and the thought of having to learn a new one scares me. There was one specifically for guitar that i liked a long time ago that was nice to use i thought. Came with lots of nice virtual pedals (guess they were just VSTs) that were kinda fun to tweak and stuff like a simplified DAW just for guitars.

Imported midis can be hell to clean up depending on how they were made. Do your best, i believe in you!!


File: 1613712508942.png (285.93 KB, 1526x864, autogen_sheetmusic.PNG)

>Imported midis can be hell to clean up depending on how they were made
Yeah the autogen gets uhh… Interesting.
Thinking about it a bit outside the box though, think I figured out a way to maybe bypass my troubles. Write the clean version in lilypond instead (which I was planning to learn anyway cause its the most sensible way of making sheet music I've found), which can output midi which I can then plug into musescore and still take advantage of its more mature (seemingly AFAIK) guitar system without having to deal with its mystifying note input.


I just don't like myself very much man


File: 1613930993684.png (156.67 KB, 516x440, 1463548418738.png)

This sushi finally caught the corona.
Fondle a juicy booty for me if I don't make it.


File: 1613942311568.jpg (136.97 KB, 1280x1591, 1602644815482.jpg)

You got the best girl at least


I knocked a glass cup into the sink and it shattered. I carefully picked most of the glass up without any problem until I brushed my hands together. I pricked my hands with smaller glass shards. It's only Monday.


That girl's forehead is HUGE!


What the HELL, why did you delete the picture?!


she just couldn't show her face anymore after that insult :(


File: 1614418794596.gif (851.61 KB, 200x200, 2096930.gif)

You're a bully of the worst order.


A Sushi posts "My life's done for."
"Your forehead's huge!" — reply insane.
I check the thread, the post is no more,
That's another life's little pain.


I don't know if it's the wisest thing to post here nor is it appropriate, but I don't have anyone in my life that I feel comfortable talking to about this and I just want to get it off my chest. Over the past month I've been getting a dull ache in my left nut that seems to come and go. I (stupidly) thought that it might just be one of those things where if I ignore it then it'll eventually go away and everything will be fine. I'm going to book an appointment with the GP tomorrow for as soon as possible, I really don't want anyone fondling my balls and the entire thing makes me feel awkward to have to talk to someone about in real life since I'm a sperg and I also know there's a good chance I'll start laughing out of both embarrassment and being immature. I did have an appointment booked a couple of weeks ago but the pain had subsided so I thought it wasn't worth going to, I guess that was a dumb move on my part so this time I'll be going even if the pain has stopped by then.


Was it actually a photo of sushi roll or was it an anime picture? As funny an insult as it is, it's okay if you have a big forehead, it doesn't make you ugly.

Brave sushi roll, that's the right decision. Don't worry they'll be used to people laughing or having other weird reactions to talking about awkward stuff and having their balls fondled. It's like half their job to get peoples clothes off, you could do loud guttural sex moans and they wouldn't really care.


It was an anime picture.


I hope ur balls dont fall off roll


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Some one lost their pitbull and now it's running all over my parents neighborhood. I only found out when I saw a white hound charging at me and my family full spead when we were gonna go out for a walk. I think the worst worst part was my moms confidence she could beat the dog. She's 5 feet and thinks her 5 pound weights were enough to take down the dog. She even went onher walk the direction the dog ran off


So a dog ran towards you and then ran away again?


Ran towards me, but when I hid in my house for a while he walked away.

My parents actually met the dog owner while they went on the second part of their walk around me. The dog's owned by a disabled dude, it's not a medical pet though, and the reason why it escaped is that his disability makes him to weak to control the dog and his fence is to short to contain it. He told my parents he's had the cops and animal control called on him multiple times. It'd a tragedy waiting to happen


Went to the GP, got my balls fondled. On antibiotics and getting my left nut scanned tomorrow hopefully.


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The past week or so I've felt very depressed and tired. Not unusual for me, but now every now and then I feel very slightly light-headed, like my balance is off for a split second.
I live an otherwise normie lifestyle - work 9-5, exercise, normal diet, not overweight, maybe a little more caffeine than most.
But this slight occasional dizziness is new - maybe I'm too stressed from work? Burnout? Low blood pressure? Somewhat concerning.


I'm getting really peeved about how damn hard it is to find a shrink where I live. I just want to be able to talk to someone man.


You can talk to me, I'm a someone sometimes!


I appreciate the offer but I feel I have to get into some personal stuff I wouldn't want to share online. For things that are less personal, well, my problems there are very commonplace, and if you've heard the complaints most common to lonely, aging NEETs with no future you've probably heard mine.


File: 1616144693986.png (199.49 KB, 480x480, floaters.png)

Got a new eye floater maybe two weeks ago in my right eye. Little shit jumps into my line of sight constantly.


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Here's a game you can't get anymore:

It's about dissociative identity disorder. I have it in my library.
They took it down on Christmas 2019, see screenshot.

This is the listing on itch.io before it was wiped:

Here's their youtube channel that's still up. You can find some trailers for a couple other games they did earlier. But it's clear that it was their last game that they had the most pride over.

They had a website too, but it wasn't archived before the domain was recycled.

I can't help but feel like they killed themself. It hurts to think about actually. I wonder what other metastories steam games could tell, if these binaries could talk…


> no future
well that's nonsense. The future is tomorrow, if you aren't dead yet then you still have a future you can forge. Have hope, and strive for your future sushi roll!



Sushi, I don't know if you're still here, but make sure you keep shitposting. Going into random communities and being me, even just to myself, got me the first friends I ever had, and if I didn't have them I'd probably be in jail or something right now. Never underestimate what even an IRC chat can do.


File: 1618663499867.png (13.4 KB, 371x311, CherryTree_compare_toolbar….png)

I've been using CherryTree a good great while for keeping my notes and loving it to bits over my prior fragmented shotgun blasted nuggets of notes strewn all over different drives and computers in duplications of different iterations and what-not.
Just figured I have never updated, went to check what version it's at and apparently the one I have is from way back in December of 2018. The current stable ver. has some issues with my files (formatting tables all wonked, crashes upon importing a CSV (which it doesnt for the same CSV if imported on a fresh file)).
A bit unsure of how to proceed. I guess I could use it as an opportunity for a virtual spring cleaning of my note library, transferring over piece by piece while restructuring and tossing out useless stuff and marking unclear nodes as needed to rewrite. It's still bothersome.
I'm almost more bothered that they've changed out the icons though, they now look like trash, and are much less apparent (at least IMO). Just look at that classy anchor. The new one I kinda have to take a second take.


File: 1618670846407.jpg (150.68 KB, 1281x721, ed9R7Od.jpg)

there are more serious problems but those are not comfy to talk about so I will talk about this. There is a visual novel called sakura no uta which I really want to read, because it is written by Sca-Ji, who wrote subarashiki hibi which is my favourite visual novel. From looking around, it seems the consensus is that sakura no uta is as good or better than subahibi. However, IT'S NOT TRANSLATED! I really want to read it but I dont know japanese! this great literature is just out of reach for me! It is possible to machine translate it, but I want to experience it as properly as possible with a real translation. It is a very frustrating situation. There seems to be reasonable demand for a translation, but I have not seen any plans to translate it, fan projects or official english release. I have even thought "maybe I should just learn japanese". Is that my only option? Very annoying.


How much text are we talking about? How many words?


I personally separate my life to pre-Subahibi and post-Subahibi periods, as reading it has completely changed how I view the world. It taught me to appreciate life much more (or rather in a different way) than I used to and also be more honest with myself. It may have a similar effect on you, or it may do nothing if it’s not your kind of thing, but one thing is clear — you’ve got to read it even if it’s the last thing you do. My life has been an ongoing quest to discover life-changing works of fiction, and despite having gone through thousands of books, movies, games and the like, I have yet to find anything to even rival Subahibi. I’m honestly getting goosebumps just remembering it.


File: 1618942324549.png (49.73 KB, 635x450, bewffkbwfjkjwefjknfbk.PNG)

I guess that's you?
Thought I have read that somewhere else already.


Might be a bit in poor taste to out someones account names just like that because they reused something they had already written on the matter elsewhere (if that's the case).


I'm pretty sure it's an ironic copypasta meme. The original comes from an obscure VN review blog.


It certainly doesn't. It certainly doesn't.


Is this is it?
Lol. Well maybe one day I 'll get around to playing it when I get around to Utawarerumono first or some other VNs.


I personally separate my life to pre-sushichan and post-sushichan periods, as posting here has completely changed how I view the world. It taught me to appreciate life much more (or rather in a different way) than I used to and also be more honest with myself. It may have a similar effect on you, or it may do nothing if it’s not your kind of thing, but one thing is clear — you’ve got to lurk it even if it’s the last thing you do. My life has been an ongoing quest to discover life-changing websites, and despite having gone through thousands of 4chan clones, I have yet to find anything to even rival sushichan. I’m honestly getting goosebumps just remembering all the fun and kindness I've had here.


vndb lists it as "Very long (> 50 hours)" so a lot. Cant find the exact word count.


The elements on my stove are slanted, so things cook unevenly.


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My GF got absolutely shitfaced last night, had a panic attack, then called me saying she's a useless burden on everyone and would be better off dead. This predictably freaks me the fuck out because she's actually tried it before and now I'm on a business trip away from home, so I say whatever I can to keep her on the line with me. I tell her how much I need her in my life, that I'm planning on getting us a place and asking her to marry me in the future. She calms down and her friends get there. I call her today, "Yeah I was pretty drunk I appreciated what you said but maybe pump the brakes a bit". Not in those exact words, but that is how I took it, and now I'm just completely beside myself with pure asshurt.


It's okay, sometimes people are dismissive and evasive with that stuff, especially after a big bout of intoxication. Perhaps the situation could've concluded worse than it did, so I think you said all you needed to say and you did a good job considering what else might've happened.


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I've built my entire identity around liking games, cartoons, anime, and manga, but I'm starting to realize I hate all of those things. The background I suppose is that I spent my time on ib growing up and I assumed everyone just had to inherently like these things. In the rare case you didn't find what what you liked you just didn't find the right media that clicked with you, "the popular stuff is all slock, look at this obscure thing". I was the latter and I tried the obscure stuff, but it never clicked. Tried popular, no luck. I don't like anything from those mediums beside 2-3 things I can tolerate.
My main irk as of now is how much time I've dumped into these hobbies I hate. One reason I didn't figure out I hated these mediums earlier is that I mostly watch/read yt/blogs on these subjects. All the creators I follow only produce content for these subjects, so I'm going to have to find new people to follow. The things I relate to people I know about is only anime, so I'll need new friends. The only sites I use are anime focused discussion. I even reflectively open manga/anime sites looking for one thing I want, but I find nothing and just sit through random sludge. I know it isn't anhedonia related depression because I enjoy other things.
Also anime art irks me now. In the back of my head I've always never registered anime as "human", but now it's gotten to the point I can't get them. I can see the skill behind it, but they just look like splotches of paint. I can see they're vaguely human, but I cannot feel anything sexual or emotionally resonant with them, no feeling of cuteness, no understanding of it's pain, etc etc. The fact I see these things every where even when anime isn't a topic irks me.
This rants a bit lighter than the other stuff here. Guess I'm gonna have to form a new identity now


>building an identity around media
That's where you screwed up, media should be a small part of your identity, not all of it.


hi friends
has anyone ever developed sudden caffeine sensitivity?
i used to enjoy a good coffee in the afternoon with no issues, now the past couple weeks weirdly a coffee in the afternoon seems to trigger a lot of anxiety and even a couple near panic attacks.
i got the vaccine a couple weeks ago and wonder if i still have some lingering unconscious anxiety about it.


Maybe the vaccine made you autistic lol


When you form a new identity be sure it isn't built around things. Find what you genuinely care about, be you, you should be your identity.


you joke, but this might be the case
i have been feeling pretty dumb the past few weeks


Reading this makes me chuckle a bit, because in some ways I'm the exact opposite. I came up largely avoiding, downplaying or hiding my inclination to cutesy anime and such. I tried to like things that, while I was not very interested in, I knew people would regard as respectable. Not to say that Anime is my life: I don't spend much time watching the latest shows, and I tend to gravitate more toward non-fiction audio books, but I always catch myself really enjoying Anime, Games, and other such things when I do encounter them.

The details of this journey would be a bit too long and heavy to discuss right now, but suffice to say, being honest with yourself is the best, I believe. Lies, no matter what kind, will always come back to bite you.


Vaccines lack the ability to do that unless the vaccine was doctored, which is inherently a conspiracy theory
In any case, caffeine interacts very strangely with a lot of chemicals you might not actually know you're consuming. Ask a doctor, don't delay on these things. Caffeine is fundamentally both a drug and a medicine in that it interacts with your body state and anything that interacts with your body state can cause problems.


File: 1624950045630.jpg (50.03 KB, 480x674, 1456035634267.jpg)

my symptoms suddenly stopped after 3 weeks and I feel back to my regular old tired self. I guess it was mental after all.


Parasites or a digestive infection or something.
I've gotten high fevers for the last couple nights, and been feeling weak.


File: 1625468989949.png (696.32 KB, 1280x652, 3.png)

Cut my hand open a few weeks ago. Doctors said 2 week recovery, but because of the position of the cut, it keeps opening back up. Can't do a lot of my favorite hobbies with one hand, so I've been very bored. Still trying to work, but that puts more stress on the wound. Hurts a lot, it often wakes me up in the middle of the night.


Im up to 180lbs from 160. Im pear shaped, and as a man thats possibly the least flattering shape you can be. I need to get serious about curtailing the stress easing and be healthy.


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Not to sound spoiled, but my parents are terrible gift givers. My dad is the more bearable because he doesn't know who I am, but still try to get what I need, he'd get me window cover in a style I don't like for example. I actually enjoy his gifts and use them somewhat. My mom on the other hand doesn't think of anything about the recipient and gives them what she "thinks" they need. Her gifts are random knick knacks or pseudo-science "healing" items. Her worst is how she buys objects without even knowing what they do. She bought a kid a toy addon, she thought it was a stand alone toy, and when they were disappointed with it, thet didn't have the toy or enjoy toys like that, she told them "to cry in their bedroom". She also bought me a "full succulent kit", her words, without reading on the back "plant not included".
It's not the gifts I hate, I'd be OK with random well though out gifts, but how little empathy she puts in them. I can't explain this without showing you who she is, but every gift she gives someone is often something she secretly wants.
I'm used to this now, but this birthday happened after something important in my life and it'd be nice if she put a little effort


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I like to lift weights, only started doing it around September of last year, but December that same year I tore something in my shoulder.
After months of taking it easy and not pushing too hard at the gym, it still has not healed all the way. I can't do full range of motion with it, nor can it lift as heavy as my other arm now, when it used to be stronger.


I tore a muscle in my upper arm about 2 years ago at my job
It took almost a whole year for the pain/uncomfortableness to go away entirely, but it eventually did. Just take it easy and don't despair that it'll never heal.


IMO lingering shoulder injuries are always worth having a doc look at them. It may be nothing, or it may be something that will require months of recovery.

This comes from someone who has a general distrust of docs.


This is something I would get checked out at a physicians. They'll perform an ultrasound to determine what problems, if any, are present. Its possible you may have severely torn a muscle, specifically the rotator cuff which is weakened in most people. Look up "Rotator Cuff Rehabilitation" for some basic exercises you can do.


>>11715 still here
Still feeling like shit.
It's been a week and I don't uite get the high fevers anymore but I instead have a steady stomachache, feels awful. I feel weak and my belly makes me constantly uncomfortable. I can barely eat.
I had some blood tests, nd I'm on antibiotics, but they don't seem to help much. I missed taking a feces test (because I didn't do any) and now I'm considering taking it and going back to the doctor….
I really wish this would end soon.


I can never seem to get through self-checkout without it calling over staff multiple times.
Last time it tried to scare me by showing a clip taken from the overhead camera of me doing what it thought was stealing. Pretty rude.


It's been too damn hot here and I can't exercise like I usually do. Winter can't come soon enough.


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OP here.
After 11 months, I am almost at the end of my bite readjustment treatment. The final step is getting crowns on my molars to make the bite permanent.
I got temporary crowns on one side a week ago and they are extremely sore and sensitive, without improvement. I really, really, hope the permanent crowns are not painful.
Fuck, why didn't anybody tell me this would be so uncomfortable. I am texting my dentist tomorrow to complain.


I know my brother should take most of the blame, but I really want to tell my parents he's failing a large part because of their hands off parenting style. They don't interact with their child until 3pm and assume he's going to be able to control himself on his gaming computer when he's had a history of procrastination/distraction issues. One has a job as an excuse, gets home at 3 gone in an hour until 8, but the other is stay at home and just chooses to sleep until 3 wake up for an hour and sleep until 7. The stay at home refuses to get involved in their schooling because "they don't get it", they don't get it because they were uninvolved for such a long time nothing makes sense. The worker only checks his grades once a month by asking him even when they had his digital gradebook and my brother will lie to look better. Not to take the blame off my brother, but my parents do literally nothing to control him and they get mad when his grades are suboptimal.
I also think my brother has executive dysfunction issues. Again not to take the blame off him, but when he talks to me about late work he tells me he has a giant mental block that stops him from doing it and the only he can overcome it is with close. He knows he's massively behind, but he just "can't get started". I had these same problems as a kid and I know it wasn't just being lazy, but not being to make your brain work without 25 life hacks. I tried telling my father, but he didn't get it and said "just start the task".
Somewhat related, this is my first time writing this out, but my dad "forgot" I was suicidal as a teen. I asked him to take me to a therapist because I was having suicidal urges. He said he would, but a month later nothing I asked him and he was waiting for his insurance. 2 months and he still didn't do anything I asked, but he just shrugged. 3 months he just asked me if I was OK and I should avoid school stress. He never bothered telling me what happened to the therapist and I really think he forgot. I didn't want to ask again on a teen because I knew it'd just make things worse, my problem were due to my relationship with him, but I lied and said school work and know he wont stop telling me "don't be stressed at school", and he would most likely still not get the therapist. I don't know what to feel or do with this memory.


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I had a similar although much less extreme experience with my parents when I was younger. I struggled with severe depression all throughout my teen years and never realized my problem was mental - according to my parents it was always "spiritual" or an "attitude" problem. However instead of talking to me about these sorts of serious issues they spent most of their free time either on house projects or watching TV. Almost every serious conversation I had with my parents was with them watching the TV instead of me.
Not until I was 27 did I realize I had some mental issues and began taking steps to fix them, with some success.

For a while I really resented my parents, eventually I realized they were only human and probably had(have) depression, but since they never believed in it they just carried on with whatever their coping mechanisms were, like distraction with TV (unfortunate for me, though).

Your parents probably suffer from a similar mental dysfunction as your brother, but since they are older its manifesting as inattention to you and your brother rather than falling behind on their own work. Just like your brother might put off work, they have been putting off work on their relationship with you to the point where things are dysfunctional. Unfortunately there is probably nothing you can do about them. Be there for your brother and do your best to guide him towards a better life however you can.


I've been away from a server for nearly a year now that I had part in for several years prior to leaving and I'm wondering if its too late for me to rejoin and try to reconnect.


I think I have some kind of stomach illness. Gonna go to the doctor if it doesn't get better today. Lots of sharp pains that feel like hunger pains even if I've already eaten, and I feel nauseous when I do actually eat.


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The palpitations are back. At least it's just psychological and not because of a heart condition, but it's still uncomfortable.


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been there, it sucks


Why doesn't he just punt the little man.
This is the law of nature.


I feel bad for my gen-ed teacher. She's recovering from cancer, but still has to teach in person and all the kids hate her because 'wah this is a gen ed I don't want to take, it's unrelated to my major, and I'm paying for it'. Never mind the fact 1. We have science related general eds, history of science, critical thinking 101, and career related, ethics in the workplace and 2. Our state has an agreement were if you finish a dirt cheap CC associates you can skip all of a 4 year colleges gen-eds. My main irk is all those clearly digging their own grave, 'this class is so easy I've skipped it 5 times' and 'I don't even read the textbook', are gonna blame the teacher once they fail in December. I know gen-eds are terrible, but just suck it up and try to make the best of it


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i had migraine auras two days in a row
previously i only got one or two a year, spaced out
really annoying


I have an incurable autoimmune disorder apparently. Oral Lichen Planus.
Sucks. Can't eat certain foods anymore. It's not enjoyable to eat these days tbh.
Hey at least I won't get fat lmao.


Damn, what can't you eat?


I eat 90% of food anyways and a good half of it triggers it.
I simply live with the pain at this point. My mouth is covered in white striations and burns, along with many healed scars of previous ones. I am slowly losing my sense of taste in certain parts of my tongue too.

But foods that I know cause it are some of my favorites as well, which sucks: French fries, Walnuts, Salt and Vinegar chips (I eat em anyways), tomatoes, eggplant, a lot of processed stuff, anything gritty, and many others I'm forgetting.


That's terrible…are you seeking/getting any treatment at all? This article suggests that there are some treatments which can ameliorate the condition: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3329692/#sec1-6title


"You're answering to fast please slow down. You cannot proceed for 5 seconds" irks me because 70% of the time it happens is because the answers are super easy. I don't need to ponder "Is this class easy?" for 5 minutes


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My health anxiety is flaring up real bad right now. I have this lump on my jaw that the doctor said was nothing, most likely a saliva stone, but another appeared and I'm obsessing over it. I went back to my old habits of comparing both sides of my body, checking for lymph nodes, and either doing nothing because I'll die soon or trying to do everything because I'll die soon.
I also developed this weird urge of 'magical thinking' trait were I wont click as site or read of book if any step relating to the process that got me there was messed up because if I do 'something bad will happen'. I'll spend minute obsessing over if a noise I heard while getting a book means I should return it. It's not serous yet, but the amount of times those thoughts creep into my head unconsciously is concerning


More of a first world issue, but I'm starting to understand people who spam 'easily googleable' questions on forums. Google and other search browser have become, so shit as of late, more so if you're doing something 'illegal' or non standard, you can't find jack unless you google a really specific phrase or are OK with your question being changed to something more acceptable. Even duckduckgo does this, so I think I'm just bad at searching

Anyhow is any one knows how to dose Polistirex, not rapid hbr, recreationaly based on weight give me the formula. Everything is made for the more rapid one


I feel you sushi roll. I've been having strange pains right below my ribcage, and also haven't been to a dentist in a very long time. I went to make an appointment for both and find myself a primary care provider yesterday but ever since I've been terrified and subconsciously sure they're gonna pull out all my teeth and diagnose me with something incurable that will kill me in a couple years. I know these are stupid feelings and they're what prevented me from going in the first place before these issues got worse, but I can't rid of them.


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I'm tired; how do I get more energy?!?


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I work out. Muscle!


My college has this untreated special needs person who goes to a lot of events and makes it weird. She's a good person, but she isn't mentally capable of living or interacting on her own. She buts into conversations loudly and makes it revolve around odd topics, "you like my key?". Everyone not wanting to be rude or scared of a break down humors her. As the event goes on they humor her with obvious disgust only she can't pick up on and something always goes wrong and she has a mental breakdown, 2/3 of the events she's gone to has ended with campus police being called to calm her down. We have support for SN students, so I don't know why she doesn't get it. A bit mean, but it feels kind of a waste sending her to college when she doesn't get the help she needs. Her career path is 100% out of reach for someone of her mental status.
I've been thinking of her because, no matter how cruel this sounds, I'm paranoid people perceive me as her or I'll get injured and reduced to her mental status. The former is just a generic fear I had that all my mannerisms come off as severely off and everyone secretly hates me. The former has been flaring up, so badly lately I'm getting paranoid to drive lest I get into a fatal injury. I'm not scared enough to no drive, but I'm paranoid. I guess thinking of her is more a reflection of me than her


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The other day I tried to drive my car forgetting I had to start it first and I was like "what if I just forgot you need to stop at red lights." Its scary. I don't get how my brain works, but what can I do…?


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Cities should have less car-centric transport


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get more sleep


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I woke up this afternoon feeling like a large thick iron spike was piercing me through my back, up through my right lung, and out through my chest. It hurts to tilt my upper body in any way and I don't feel like doing anything at all. I'm supposed to be researching for a podcast I'm guest starring on but I just can't get started.
I haven't felt anything like this since I was a smoker, and it's the reason I quit smoking two years ago. I just want to lie in bed and be obliterated.


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I don't think I have a healthy approach to grief. When I comfort people I say that "you never stop missing them but it eventually hurts less". I'm just parroting what I've heard other people say though, it hasn't been true for me. I can only stop mourning when I keep my mind off the loss, if I think about them too much, no matter how long it's been, it feels just as raw and painful as when they first died. It just feels like with every loss a hole is ripped in my life and it's just more and more empty.


I came to the realisation that my mental health influences what I consume to jack off.
If it is in a good condition I use vanilla or don't even touch myself, if it is in a bad condition I use disgusting and disturbing stuff.


>After 10 or so years of my right jaw clicking when opening and closing, I got a sudden pain and now my jaw doesn't click anymore. Thing is, I can only open my mouth about half of what I used to be able to.

I found myself in the same situation a couple of weeks ago, my solution was trying to force it to open a couple of times a day for a couple of days, it opening all the way now but i feel like my jaw is in the wrong place,oh well, at least i didnt have to go to a doctor.

Been feeling a bit down lately, the few friends i have are going out and having fun without me, they arent even talking to me, i dont have the willpower to do something productive, been just watching movies all alone in my room all day.


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My throat has been itching and I've felt a sickness coming on since yesterday. My stepdad got sick so he must have infected me and my mom. Hopefully not with what I think it is.


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Hope it's nothing serious


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On the constructive side, how do I cut someone I share a class with off? I can't say "fuck off" because we have the same class and some friend overlap, so it'll make things weird. I also need constant ghosting excuses because he can just ask me in class. Also want to hang with his friends without him. Also I'm a woman too, also one weaker than him, so cutting him off has a small chance of it ending with violence against me. I need something that wont put me on his shit list
On the vent side my "friend", well he's to much of a dick to be friend now, is doing things that makes him a creep to woman. Every time I mention a female friend he says "ArE tHEy LoOkiNG fOr A rELaTiOnShIp" and wont listen when I say how I don't like him asking that. He says he wont hit on woman friends I bring to hang, but you can tell he wants to. He told a girl they only like their bf because he's white then said it's doomed to fail because it's interracial. He called another woman a whore for engaging in pre marital sex. He's put a girlfriend in an awkward confession situation. He's also asked me and my friends multiple times if I know any woman looking for hook ups and one nightstands which got the same "I'm uncomfortable now" vibes, which he ignored and said "it's a joke". He wasn't this aggressive when I first met him, so thats why he became friends. He's become aggressive now though. I'm warning girls I know before I hang with him and I understand that's not normal. I'm cutting him off right now and I deeply regret entertaining him now.
The good thing is among my friends the weirdo is so hated if he dares make any woman uncomfortable he has a few dudes ready to beat his ass.

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