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 No.5616

Do you have faith, sushi?

I have this old memory when I, as a kid, lost a precious toy. Asked God to help me find it, but to no avail. I blamed God for this misfortune and declared that I no longer believe.

Now I would say I am an agnostic, but I think I really want to find God. God, as someone to talk to, to confess to and to find support in. Lately I faced a lot of difficulties and praying helped me. I even made few liabilities, that I now struggle to accomplish.

When things go well I forget about my prayings and obligations, there is that thought that it is all my work and not some old dude above my head. Until now I went by this and it made me feel like a tiny, tiny man.

I really want to believe, but something is stopping me. Please, share something about yourself.

 No.5617

I don't believe in anything, with the exception perhaps that I don't believe in anything.

 No.5618

I don't believe in any god worth worshipping. I used to have faith, at least that God would protect me and protect the things I was grateful for, until something unimaginably horrible happened and I lost it all. I desperately needed help for a long time afterwards, pleaded with God for it, and none came.

To me, if God exists, he is one who betrays freely.

 No.5619

church is a once a week club where sober and successful people hang out
I'd rather go to church than a bar tbh
it's not just spiritual, religion also has a social aspect of it as well
atheists who don't go to church often miss this component of it

 No.5620

>>5619
I can't help but see all churches as nothing more than cults.

 No.5626

nothing organized
I believe there is at least one other higher being, and that being is instrinically tied to this material universe (not apart and distinct from it, as with Judaism)
furthermore, that the interaction of one with the universe is significant, that the overall purpose of life is to transcend this material existence, and to understand the process by which the supreme being/universe is self-creating
I don't have a good framework for this thinking yet

 No.5627

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>>5616
I believe in god but I don't pretend to know anything about him. I consider myself christian in culture at the very least, and I would say I'm a supporter of the church in gwneral. I like catholics a lot, they seem like they look after their own properly. Lots of denominations are too "open" for my liking.
Even if not spiritual, a religion may serve to keep a group working together and looking after one another. Thats the real reason every town would have a church.
If they start caring more for people outside their group then I think it fails at its most important function of keeping a society united, cooperative and secure.

I expect my views are very outspoken though so it's not like I'm going around telling people their way is wrong. I just keep such opinions restricted to people who ask or in the actions I take.

 No.5631

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>>5620
Well, the reason we think cults are bad is because they often turn out to be hotbeds of insane, immoral doings. The Jim Jones cult ended in a mass suicide; other cults only exist to provide a harem for an abusive sex addict. But, some fringe churches aside, the case is not similar in most churches. It might be different where you live; where I live church means a weekly meeting of generally friendly believers who listen to a priest. There isn't much room for a sex cult there.

>>5626
>I believe there is at least one other higher being, and that being is instrinically tied to this material universe (not apart and distinct from it, as with Judaism)
Interesting. There was a philosopher called Benedict de Spinoza who thought that the world was God. That is, all that exists is the same thing as God and he is not apart from the things He created. The physical universe is the physical manifestation of God and all the minds of people and animals are the mental manifestation of God. Sounds like you might be on to something similar.

 No.5647

>>5616
My opinion on religion is that it's fantastic if it helps you out and enriches your life, but as soon as you feel like forcing said religion on others you can shove a rusty pitchfork up your ass.

That's why I'm not a huge fan of christians and especilly muslims.

 No.5649

Yes, I identify as a Christian. I grew up Catholic but I felt like services were more like rituals. I had a time where I identified as agnostic until I realized alot of my issues stemmed from my lack of faith in others, myself and ultimately a lack of faith in God. So I started searching, took a religious studies class in college to learn about different Faiths. I really liked buddhism's middle way idea and still do, although my visit to a Buddhist temple showed me that they do worship Buddha like a god even though they say they don't. Anyway, I was drawn to becoming a born again believer because the church I visited taught from the Bible in a way I could understand, and I felt something personal at the church I decided to attend. I was a huge pothead and dabbled in substance use (nothing hard) and I thought I'd always be like this until I accepted Jesus as lord and savior of my life, then I found I didn't need it. I also found it interesting how Christianity is the only faith where salvation is yours to accept freely, whereas other faiths make the believer do so many good works and hope they've done enough to get to heaven.
I'm not perfect, I still struggle with personal stuff but I know that Jesus is my savior. I know it's hard to believe for some of you out there, I was agnostic once myself and wouldn't believe a post like the one I'm writing if I were to come across it ten years ago, but here I am.
I hope your search for God leads you to Jesus. Be wary of the media's portrayal of us and visit a few local churches and make your own judgement. Good luck and God bless.

 No.5650

Try psychedelics?

I had ego death and saw "god". To me, it's much more than some guy in the sky, god is the eternal rhythm of the universe, life, experience, something indescribable in words. I still consider myself as agnostic, but I felt something larger than me, and it has made me think about life in so many different ways. I would highly recommend it if that's what you're looking for. It's something personal, and I feel not touched by a lot of faiths.

 No.5651

>>5650
Oh also to add, I think the idea of the Tao makes a lot of sense after psychedelics. Yin and yang, in and out, being and not being, togetherness and separation. To me, it seems there is an order to everything, and a constant ebb and flow with how things act.

 No.5652

I am deeply interested in mysticism. I actually spent a month with the Carmelite nuns. I have two years before I have to make the decision to enter officially though.

 No.5654

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>>5616
I was raised to be religious (basically grew up in a Lutheran church), and although I enjoy reading the bible and other religious scriptures, I mostly do it for self improvement and self belief. This helps me when I have to ignore parts that I do not agree with.

> there is that thought that it is all my work and not some old dude above my head.


Maybe you're right. After all, it was you that experienced whatever happened. You actions(be it direct or indirect) caused them to happen. take the time to appreciate your accomplishments. You decided to seek God out in order to gain some form of stability. That was your doing.

I was taught that God is all around us. In my opinion, the Holy Trinity is a good starting point. Holy Spirit is the one I connect with the most. So the wind, the tree branch, that dog you saw yesterday and our feelings/thoughts are all a part of God. I focus more on the feeling of receiving mental strength and being understood. Helps me feel empowered when I realise that everything in this world is connected. The Sushi a few posts above this one explained it better that I did. "God is the eternal rhythm of the universe, life, experience, something indescribable in words."

But at the end of the day, how you view and use the religion is up to you. As long as it benefits you I'd say that it's working. if you don't feel comfortable with where you're at, try reading up on different religions and viewpoints. Hopefully you'll gain enlightenment and peace.

 No.5656

>>5652
Wow, that's interesting. What was life like with the nuns?

>>5650
>I still consider myself as agnostic, but I felt something larger than me, and it has made me think about life in so many different ways.
But you were having a hallucination. I don't really understand how you can draw conclusions about the universe from a temporary alteration of your brain chemistry.

 No.5660

>>5616
I'm not a religious person myself, i was an atheist materialist for some time and that fucked me up really hard, to a point i had a strange lucid dream were i was on the verge of disappearance and desintegration and i couldnt see a reason to keep living and the only thing that made sense on that moment was suicide. When i woke up it was like atheism was the most retard idea ever, and its kinda how i feel till today. I've messed up with the occult for some time after that, but it wouldn't fill my void. Tried some practices from eastern religions like islam, hinduism and buddhism to no avail.
I tried going back to my religion too, but it doesn't feel aesthetically pleasing enough, i honestly am more about aesthetics than theological solidity, which made me live in a paradox between the Catholic church that once was or that could be and a pantheon inside my own head, divine beings i can feel as if they were me in strange times and lives. All this batshit insane post just to say: go read Chesterton, he might do for you what he couldnt do for me.

 No.5675

>>5656
Yeah that's my holdup. A lot of people feel the same thing so it's hard to discern whether or not I actually saw god. Nonetheless, I have faith in what I experience, and believe emotion or experience to be a reflection of some truth. Not an attack on rationality, but I believe there is some value in trusting one's perceptions. Even if they don't line up 100% with reality as we can test beyond ourself, what we perceive is part of our reality.

 No.5676

I was raised by not very religious parents which didn't try to force me into believing or not believing, and after being kinda religious as a kid I ended up being an atheist (despite going to a primary school where religion was considered. We went to pray once a year and had religion lessons)
>>5660
Imo religion is not the only way to fill the void. But it works I guess
>>5675
I've always seen reality as something real, concrete, and that would exist even without me. As such my subjective view is imperfect and partially untrue: if I mistake a ball for a brick, it's still a ball. If I get hit by it I don't get hurt even if in "my reality" I would. All the fear I'd feel while seeing the brick/ball fly towards me would be a mistake, and nothing more.



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