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/lounge/ - sushi social

don't forget to smile :]
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Remember to keep it cozy!

Captchas didn't work. Sticking to janitors while we try to think of something else.

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How long did it take for you to realize that a positive mind with positive thoughts will lead up to results that are positive?

I had to take some huge Ls for it to happen but eventually, I just can't stop smiling! (figuratively speaking)


I don't know, if you're already doing well it's easy to be positive. If you're not, it's impossible.
I still try to not indulge anger or self-pity too much, it helps a little.


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>don't know, if you're already doing well it's easy to be positive. If you're not, it's impossible.
I think it's a line of thinking that it has to be slowly built.
A good way of seeing it is trying to see good in bad, like that indian song says. Life is an endless lesson I like to say, so you can always get some good knowledge from all the things that may be happening across you.


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Just do it


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They key is to adopt a philosophy of unbridled optimism; rather than worrying about changing the world, change your own perception of the world so that everything is positive!


Trying to be positive and optimistic in the past has only caused me to trust people I shouldn't have trusted, which has only lead to more pain. This mindset is probably fine if you don't have abusive people in your life, but not everyone is so lucky.


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>This mindset is probably fine if you don't have abusive people in your life, but not everyone is so lucky.
Ditch those people, they will harm you in the long run.
If you can't, then don't waste your energy on them, chances are you pay them more attention that you should and this leads up to frustration.
I know things will work out eventually if you know the right people.


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Never give up


yeah, I also learnt this the hard way.
never be optimistic and positive around people you are not close to, they'll take that as a signal that you are lower than them in the social hierarchy.

like hyenas, you're gonna get bit because of the perceived weakness.

you can only afford to be optimistic and positive if you are a female. Only females can pull this off, because instinctively others want to mate with them, so their kindness will not be perceived as weakness but rather as a signal that the female may be pursued.

you can agree with me or huss me out, but this doesn't change the fact that most of our behaviour is genetically driven.


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This post reeks of incel-bait.
No, your distorted view of the world isn't how it works.
Maybe if you get burned by your own beliefs, you'll eventually learn what you're doing wrong, but you can still steer the wheel to a cliff, it's your life.


yeah i kind of can see the first line being accurate in SOME cases??? but eurgh this is incel as fuck


yeah as soon as the word "females" pops up you know it's going straight to incel territory


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Man, it is SO ANNOYING!
I decided to log myself out of Youtube because of a recent thing I don't wanna get spoiled on, so the algorithm won't feed me nonsense.
So technically I am clean, since I deleted my Youtube history, and what do I get constantly suggested, even though I have deleted my video history?
No wonder this generation of men is so lost, the fuggin' platforms that feed content to most of the population just end up deceiving them into negative thoughts.
(It can't be just me right? I'd like to see what happens to you when you log out of your google account and what does the algorithm suggest)
I'm fuming!


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I think I kind of understand what you're talking about, but I can't say that I fully agree with your line of thinking. Forcing baseless optimism and positive thoughts onto people when they have legitimate problems to be concerned about isn't exactly a good thing, either. Like, if I told you to stop fuming and spreading negative mindset on sushi, and to brainwash yourself with positive attitude regarding this issue or to put it off your mind entirely forever, wouldn't that make you angry instead?

As for the Google account, it may be insufficient to simply log out. YouTube always asks me if I want to use cookies or something because mine are cleared every time upon browser exit and because I've been too lazy to install an add-on which would automatically reply to that. I don't think my recommendation feed is skewed towards "BAD VIBES GASLIGHT", whatever that is, although there are videos like that sometimes, I think.


By the way, fake positivity and optimism are very American. Acting this way around Europeans, especially those from Eastern Europe, will make you appear naive or foolish.


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It's not baseless or fake, I have seen what happens when you have a negative mindset, I have experienced it first hand.
You start to pick up choices that affect negatively in your life, it goes a long way to bite you in the ass and leads up to denying yourself opportunities with love, money, or even companionship.
BTW the youtube schizo talk was just me not deleting my cookies properly
>Acting this way around Europeans, especially those from Eastern Europe, will make you appear naive or foolish.
You gotta be very dumb or think very lowly of yourself to put what others think about you above what you perceive of yourself


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Or, it will make you a fun person to discuss an endeavor with. Not every kind of attitude or approach that doesn't instantly demoralize you and tries to give you motivation to do stuff really deserves to be ridiculed and despised and the labels of being forced or fake.

Although, there are, of course, extreme cases like this.

Besides, there is such a thing as enacted pessimism as well. Some people just love to trample upon others' ideas and dreams. There is also the kind of negative thinking about the world that people adopt as an excuse for themselves to put no earnest effort into stuff. After all, maybe you really should put that effort into something more fruitful and way less risky instead. Maybe the circumstances are indeed so adverse that any kind of light-hearted, optimistic suggestion would seem like an insult. But sometimes this kind of thinking becomes a trap. And sometimes, there is just no viable way around something that needs to be done.



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Ever since I tried some personal therapy. Most CBT and DBT books agree that it's OK to feel negative emotions, but mellowing in them and letting them control you is a bad idea.
Have any of you used this in regard to paranoid thoughts or minor delusions? I'm prone to paranoid breaks, so I have to set a rule when I start thinking things like "Is my room real?" or "How do I know my friends aren't conspiring against me" I simply ignore any thoughts I have for the following hour and do I mind consuming task. The more I think of paranoid thought the realer they become, so I have to ignore them whenever they pop up.


I did a lot of therapy in high school and at the beginning of college. Worked extremely hard in there. It taught me how to find the contradictory and unrealistic elements of my thought patterns.

There are still times when I slip into bad cycles, but it's the ability to move forward on a day-to-day basis that matters for me. I have observed, personally, that when I am healthy and am kind to others, I have more good experiences and my heart is a little lighter. So I just strive for that.

It might be one of those things everyone has to figure out for themselves, but I do think there is value in rejecting the impulse to adopt a nihilistic viewpoint in general.


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This is something that I always knew, but it's not so simple. Before you can enter that feedback loop, you need to place yourself in a situation that warrants it. You need direction. No-one learned a new language by hoping really hard that they wake up fluent the next day. But if you hope that taking the first step will lead to a good outcome, and that continuing on that path will get you somewhere worth the journey, you'll get results.

>if you're already doing well it's easy to be positive. If you're not, it's impossible

Manage your expectations and it'll become possible. In the beginning, I was setting the bar so low for myself that I was doing well most of the time. Once I realized I could push myself little harder, I tested how hard I could take things until I was failing more often than I was succeeding and used that to define new thresholds of success.

Assume that you are exceedingly dumb and extremely lazy. Plan according to those expectations. Soon enough, you'll earn yourself the right to suspect you're not as dumb or as lazy as you first believed. Proving others wrong can get you to feel smug, but proving yourself wrong is cathartic and adds to the momentum you've built. >>15248 mentions a slow build-up. This is the case, but you cannot approach it from the perspective that you'll keep escalating your pace to infinity. Eventually, you'll find your limit for time and effort spent. After that, you'll find it easy to remain positive, because your track record to that point bore fruit, so the road ahead will continue to be fruitful. Feedback loops.

>rather than worrying about changing the world, change your own perception of the world so that everything is positive!

I think excessive optimism can be as crippling as the opposite. Closing yourself off to negative emotions can be almost as damaging as giving in to those feelings. If you become too happy about yourself, you'll stagnate. Revenge is a life well lived, so long as you get to rub it in all your enemies' faces (why social media is so popular).

>abusive people

Great example of the above. You can be an optimist and assume your instinct is wrong, that these people can surprise you, that you're missing some vital piece of information that reframes the whole way you instinctively interpret these people's actions. But how far can you take that line of thinking until you go from giving someone a chance to being naive?

I got burned pretty hard in the past, trying so hard to see the good in someone my very Soul was squinting.

In short: enact systems, manage expectations, balance things out. See the glass half full but don't be too eager to share.

– Input from someone who got back on the horse, having spent longer on the ground after falling spectacularly off of it than on the horse.


Life sometimes gets hard
But you gotta be strong.


The post with the Candide video was intended to be facetious (Candide was written to be a satire of the "best of all possible worlds" philosophy), but I think the reference was lost.


I was so absorbed in creating the very model of a modern majires that it didn't occur to me to watch the video.


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I hate vacuuming but it's got to be done…


I'm reading a book where one of the main characters is named Candide, I wonder if that was meant to be a direct reference. It's called The Snail on the Slope. It is quite good so far.


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Glad you're feeling positive. In my experience thinking positive doesn't work and its just guess level advice that keeps getting spread around.

Most of your thoughts are downstream from what's going on in your life. The key is to force yourself to act better and do things that will pay off eventually. Doesn't matter whether you are in a good mood or feel like shit as long as it gets done. Eventually you'll have some good results coming down the pipe and your mindset will improve.

I'm sure you've heard this all before but doing the basics to stay healthy goes a long way. I found a game changer was fasting once or twice a week. It's a pain to do but if you can take a day and just eat dinner, no other meals, you'll feel a lot better afterwards. If that's too hard, the day before try eating high fat no carb keto meals and it will make the transition easier. Just doing the basics with health, fitness, getting you life together will force you to be more positive. It's not easy but the idea is pretty simple.

Another game changer I found is having what I would call a mutation mindset or some less cringy title lol. Basically people get stuck in certain patterns with how they think and act. Your logic and conventional thinking can only get you so far. Sometimes its good to try random stuff and do things you would normally never do and see what happens. A lot of people think they suck at something, no one likes them, their life sucks or stuff like that. If you start doing things differently that might not be the case, or at least you'll have the hope that things can change.

It's like evolution, you mostly have natural selection but there are also mutations. Cows are bred to have the most meat, and people follow a pattern if it feels good. One day you might randomly get a cow with two tails which ends up being a good thing because you can sell more ox tail soup. If you try random patterns or act in a way you would normally never think of things might get a lot better. Most of the time mutated cows get bad birth defects, and trying something new isn't always going to be a positive experience but you just have to roll the dice once in a while.

Yea I know what you mean. I switch between like 4 different accounts depending on what recommendations I want to see. I started doing that after my main account got full of negative stuff that doesn't matter.

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