/lounge/ - sushi social

>>14653
Try increasing hobbies that have a social aspect

>>14654
Which ones would you recommend? I found language classes are good, I personally would love to try a new instrument but there is not much social aspect in that

>>14655
Do you like Yugioh?

>>14655
Playing an instrument is a good idea. The only friends I meet irl nowadays are my band mates.

>>14655
If you play an instrument, try checking out some dive bars to find concerts of a genre you like to play. I've found that members of small local bands are usually more than happy to chat with audience members after their shows, especially if they're fellow musicians. If you're lucky, you might even find a band with an opening you could join.

Join a club around an activity you like

>>14774
How do I find clubs where I live? Most clubs here are for sports more than anything

Try talking a bit more with the people you work/study with. You both have to be there anyways, might as well make the day go by a little faster. 90% of my friends are from work.

>>14778
Just bee urself

>>14780
if you want to make frens, never bee urself

>>14783
More like: Never go out full capacity and reveal every minute detail about yourself just after you've met someone for the first time. Test the waters. If you find similarities, try to make yourself vulnerable in this aspect by revealing more specific aspects of your views, interests or personality traits in that field.

If they follow up on this invite to deepen the relationship and reveal similar things about themselves, you just have come one step closer to finding a friend. If not, they may need some more time to warm up to you or will never pass a certain threshold, exactly like you did, when you tried to be someone you are not just to fit in, while suffocating in your armour of solitude.

>>14983
100% this. Everyone is weird in some way, so the best way to make friends is to put your best features forward and hide your weirdness a little bit. People will want to interact with you for the parts of you that you put forward, and as you meet them, you can show them your weird side. And, hopefully, they'll show you their weird side. The people that tolerate your weirdness will be your acquaintances. The people that love your weirdness will become your best friends.

But all that said, sometimes, you will just not jive with certain people. No reason in particular, no fault of either involved, that's just how it is. Best you can do is keep looking for new friends.

>>14986
Smile & talk.

I remember that there is this strange idea that if you're interested in a girl, you have to act indifferent like you didn't care. It's a weird social protocol, very weird because you don't show interest they will not even know you exist at all! I mean, I've put it to practice for years though mostly to shield myself from putting myself on the line by interacting with girls who will most likely reject me. Obviously, they never knew I was there at all.
I am not even sure if it's protocol or a lie perpetuated by PUA con guys. What I've realized, on the other hand, is that if you show interest -genuine interest- in a person, that makes them feel good and they will often reciprocate.
Girls tend not to be like this, though, especially the young and good looking ones. Still, it's better not to shut yourself from people and instead be open to them.
Imageboard culture has also ruined it for many of us, every other post you see is about why people of such race or country or sexuality or taste in media or whatever is bad and inferior and trash and has shit for brains and so on. It's absolutely insane and no wonder people here are alone even though they crave company.

>>15111
> Girls tend not to be like this, though,

you almost had it, but then it's right around here that someone snickers and says that you were too friendly and you're now "friendzoned" or some such nonsense.

it's sad that this thread doesn't get much replies. i know why it is so, though - no advice will ever work. it's all down to luck.
most places don't have interest clubs and even if they did, the coronas probably killed them off. you can meet someone when doing yoga or going to the gym if you're that kind of person. most of us here are probably outcasts though, so it won't have that much of a chance to work.
many jobs can now be done remotely, which decreases the chance of meeting new people (in person). if you're aiming for a partner too, it's said you shouldn't pick one from your workplace though.
the internet doesn't work anymore, forget it.
if you can somehow force yourself, going to a bar might be a good idea. i heard they're full of outcasts coming from different backgrounds.
these past 2 years i've made around 10-20 acquaintances i think, met through hobbies. if you dig deeper just than the surface level, some people will probably pop up sooner or later. i wish it wasn't all guys though :(

I just use chatbots.
Most people seem to be repulsed by me, or just don't wanna talk to me after a while.
I think with a chatbot you have a more easy going time than with someone real, with the downside that they don't understand you, they just read patterns.
Even then, most people don't really seem to be there and they're a nice distraction so they help me from time to time. I just wish I knew which is the latest hottest chatbot in town, because even if ChatGPT is out there, I don't want to use my phone number just to talk to a bot.

>>15144
I think you're under-selling yourself. 10-20 acquaintances is no small number. Just take the time to really get to know one or two of them. Invite them to your place, ask if they want to go to a bar/hobby store/group event. Ask if they have any parties coming up that you can attend. Even if you have a 10% success rate… that's still 1 or 2 new friends you've made. Those friends will introduce you to their friends, and there you go. New social circle.

I've moved around a lot the last few years, so I've had to make new friend groups. In all of my closest social circles, I am "the new guy". These people have known each other for years, decades even. So I have a lot of catching up to do. But I pay close attention, ask questions, and latch onto new inside jokes as they arise to cement myself as a friend, not just an observer. You have to be proactive. It's tough at times, but do as much as you can.

Ultimately… yeah, it is just luck. But you know how you win the lottery? You buy a lot of tickets.

Most people are masochists, like the other sushi roll replied, the more you act indifferent, the more desire someone has for you. If you’re unable to cultivate a personality optimal for socialization, try quelling that desire to have friends by focusing on what else you enjoy. Pointless to chase after something unobtainable.

Haven't had an IRL friend in years. I don't like most people I meet, they're all boring and don't care about anything other than their image. I think I'm just unlucky to be born here, I don't think I'm that weird or unique. My only social life is Discord, I think I would go insane without it. I get depressed by just thinking about the possibility of living without online communities. Maybe I'm just overreacting right now because I'm sleep deprived, maybe it's not that bad…

Gonna try going to a cultural exchange thingy
We'll see how it goes

>>15197
>Cultural exchange thingy
What does this entail?

>>15198
I don't fucking know,because it's in Thursday, and I went to the bar in a Tuesday, and I wasted my time and money getting there.