we need more greentext>be me>shit myself

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File: 1672180981344.jpg (64.86 KB, 1125x967, Least Fr_nch Contraceptive.jpg)

Anonymous 12/27/22 (Tue) 22:43:01 No.4130

we need more greentext
>be me
>shit myself

Anonymous 12/28/22 (Wed) 08:33:07 No.4131

File: 1672216387358.jpg (12.99 KB, 259x194, tyson2383kg.jpg)

>>4130
>be 12
>playing with beyblades with guy from school
>he randomly says loser has to suck the winners dick
>for some reason I agree
>my dragoon fucking let me down
>sucked my first dick due to losing a beyblade match
>mfw

Anonymous 12/28/22 (Wed) 08:54:20 No.4132

File: 1672217659717.jpg (47.09 KB, 1024x848, url(11).jpg)

>be me
>can't sleep at night
>end up watching a movie up until 6am
>sun is creeping in
>will have to drink a red bull to seize the day
I can't wait until I get my prescription for sleeping pills

Anonymous 01/04/23 (Wed) 08:55:26 No.4140

>be me
>working customer service
>i help customers that come up to me
>customer gets close to me
>greet them as usual
>"hello, good evening!"
>"no"
>no?

Anonymous 01/09/23 (Mon) 23:07:09 No.4143

>>4140
Obviously it wasn't a good evening. I'm inclined to agree.

Anonymous 01/10/23 (Tue) 00:22:22 No.4144

>be me
>ride bus

Anonymous 01/29/23 (Sun) 21:40:08 No.4175

File: 1675028407018.gif (74.47 KB, 600x600, adasdasd.gif)

>be me
>be extremely horny because of physical activities I've been getting into, sometimes jerking 4 times a day
>crank it to some real hardcore incest lolicon
>my dick ends up bleeding out because I broke the frenulum
>end up painting the whole bathroom red
>feel happy just because I like pain, laugh through the whole thing
>still worried about it, end up talking to my friends about me cutting my string doing "funny things"
>my sister said i'm too stupid to even be a coomer
>arrive to the hospital
>have to wait 5 hours just to get checked
>they just put some gauze inside my foreskin and use a bit of anaesthetics
>by the time I arrive home the gauze leaks out and I just drop blood from my cock
>can't do physical activities that were helping me to feel good mentally and now just rot in bed until it goes away
>CAN'T COOM
AAAAAAAAAAAA

Anonymous 01/30/23 (Mon) 01:02:59 No.4176

what the FRICK

Anonymous 01/30/23 (Mon) 01:26:51 No.4177

>wake up
>extremely horny
>want to fap
>touch dick
>its sore
i seriously need to stop masturbating so much

Anonymous 01/30/23 (Mon) 17:43:12 No.4178

File: 1675100592629.jpg (394.16 KB, 1000x936, __original_drawn_by_chutoh….jpg)

>take car in for oil change
>hey your starter sounds pretty bad, you might want to get that replaced
>okay.jpg
>…but we don't have the part here so we'll have to order it, we'll call you in 3-4 days when it's in
>2 days later
>kachachaclickclick
>kachachaclickclick
>kachachaclickclickclickclick
>car won't start
>shit, really don't want to have to get it towed
>let's ask the google
>people suggest hitting the starter with a hammer
>can't reach it because it's behind other parts
>open and close the hood a few times instead
>try starting again
>kachachacharooooom
>it fucking worked
>take it back to the shop

On the bright side I got this sick rental with heated seats in the meantime.

Anonymous 02/01/23 (Wed) 07:51:35 No.4180

>>4175
>go on sushichan
>read silly billy greentext–
>never touch penis again